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　　Parents often believe that they have a good relationship with their teenagers．But last summer, Joanna and Henry noticed a change in their older son：suddenly he seemed to be talking far more to his friends than to his parents．“The door to his room is always shut, ”Joanna noted．

　　Tina and Mark noticed similar changes in their 14-year-old daughter．“She used to cuddle up(蜷伏)with me on the sofa and talk, ”said Mark．“Now we joke that she does this only when she wants something．Sometimes she wants to be treated like a little girl and sometimes like a young lady．The problem is figuring out which time is which．”

　　Before age 11, children like to tell their parents what’s on their minds．“In fact, parents are first on the list, ”said Michael Riera, author of Uncommon Sense for Parents with Teenagers．“This completely changes during the teen years, ”Riera explained．“They talk to their friends first, then maybe their teachers, and their parents last．”

　　Parents who know what’s going on in their teenagers’ lives are in the best position to help them．To break down the wall of silence, parents should create chances to understand what their children want to say, and try to find ways to talk and write to them．And they must give their children a mental break, for children also need freedom, though young．Another thing parents should remember is that to be a friend, not a manager, with their children is a better way to know them．

　　本文談論的是父母與孩子關系的問題。喬安娜和亨利發現他們的兒子與他們交談少了而與朋友交談多了。提娜與馬克夫婦在他們14歲的女兒身上也發現了同樣的問題。文章最后一段建議父母做孩子的朋友而不是管理者。

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　　Do not live in the past whether you are thinking about your personality or your life; success means focusing on the here and now．While it is important to acknowledge the choices and experiences which resulted in you being where you are today, it is equally important not to allow yourself to become so caught up in thoughts of the past that the present day passes you by．

　　Self-motivation is the key to ensuring that you do not continue repeating the same mistakes．You may have had one or more errors in judgment which led you to take the wrong path, or to make mistakes that were not in your best interest．You can acknowledge this without rehashing(重復談論)them over and over again in your mind, and simply be determined to make different, better decisions today．

　　Then is over; this is now．The less time and effort you put into looking at the past, the more you will have for living and experiencing this day．You will also find that letting go of the past will give you a deeper sense of strength．Instead of allowing past mistakes and worries to drain your energies, you will have a renewed energy to live your life to the fullest and enjoy it more．

　　Being content with yourself and optimistic(樂觀的)about your future is not difficult．Whatever is in the past is over; learn from it and move on．When you are self-motivated enough to do this, you will see that moving ahead is the best definition of living life．

　　With that said, what can you do now?Sure it is easy for me to tell you to forget the past, yet it is a whole different practice to actually do it．Life is a complex set of events, much of which of course is real, yet a large amount is just your view of what really happened．

　　The first step in trying to minimize(最小化)the effects of your past in order to concentrate on your future is to find out how much of the past that you are certain happened was just mistakes on your part．