Question

假設你是李華，幾天前你從某國外網站購買一支錄音筆，現在你發電子郵件到該網站反應以下問題：

1．音質不太清楚；2.操作不簡便：3.經常出問題。

期待的解決辦法：1.退貨退款；2.修理或調換。

注意：1.詞數100左右，開頭和結束語已為你寫好，不計入總詞數；

2．可適當增加細節，以使行文連貫；

3．參考詞匯：錄音筆 recording pen。

Dear Sir or Madam，

   I’m writing to tell you something about the recording pen I bought from your website several days ago.

____________________________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________________________

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Yours，

Li Hua

 

Answer 1

【答案】

 

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to tell you something about the recording pen . I bought it from your website several days ago .However , there seems to be something wrong with it .First , the voice isn’t so clear as you claimed .Second ,it’s not easy to operate , which has caused me much trouble .What I expect is a human –friendly one. Third , it often breaks down , while a recording pen at such a price shouldn’t have had so many problems.

Due to its poor quality and much inconvenience it has caused, I wonder whether you can do something about it .I would appreciate it very much if I can get my money back . I’ll send it back to you as soon as you return the money to me. If it can’t be helped, I wish you could have it repaired or changed.

I’m looking forward to your early reply .

Best wishes,

Yours,

Li Hua

【解析】

試題分析：本篇書面表達是要求寫封電子郵件，反映所購買產品的質量問題。電子郵件是人們日常生活中常用的一種應用文體，同學們應該對寫作格式很熟悉，但是在寫作時要注意以下方面：一. 因為是反映問題，所以要求語言簡潔，條理清楚，把存在的問題和自己的要求表達準確；二. 雖然產品存在問題，但是語言仍要委婉，禮貌顯示出作者的修養；三. 時態方面，因為是敘述產品現在存在的問題，所以可以用一般現在時態，期待解決辦法部分可以使用將來時態。四. 注意適當增加細節，使語言更為通順，行文更為連貫。

【亮點說明】文章要點全面，詳略得當。關聯詞語 first。。。second 。。。third 等詞的使用使文章層次分明，脈絡清楚。其次, 文中定語從句which has caused me much trouble . 并列句while a recording pen at such a price shouldn’t… 條件狀語從句if I can get my money back和主語從句等的使用豐富了范文的句式，也成了文章的一大亮點。此外, 作者在表述要求和解決辦法時使用了I wonder whether…; .I would appreciate it very much if…和I wish you could…等等，這些委婉的措辭顯得作者態度特別禮貌誠懇，使人不忍拒絕。

考點：考查提綱作文